The A.R.T. of Love

Love. You can’t see it, touch it, hear it, taste it. It’s elusive and invisible. It comes out of nowhere and dissipates like mist in the wind, leaving us reeling in its wake.

It is nowhere to be seen, yet it is everywhere to be found. It is nothing…yet it is everything.

It controls our thoughts, affects our happiness, sways our decisions–yet it is as intangible as the wind.

The world is obsessed with love. We try to define it in every medium imaginable–music, literature, film, dance–because love truly is a work of A.R.T.

It is a breathtaking masterpiece, a prima ballerina assoluta performing a ballet of life, the magnum opus of the heart.

But what is love, really?

Love is not the momentary fluttery feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you meet ‘the one.’

It’s not the hopeful, excited feeling you get when you stand at the alter staring forever in the face. It’s not the deep contentment and joy you experience when everything in your marriage is going well.

It’s all these things…and much more.

Love isn’t always perfect. It isn’t a fairy tale or a storybook, and it doesn’t always come easy. It is the choice to love someone when you don’t like them very much and to stay and fight for your marriage when it would be easier to simply walk away.

Love is choosing to put the needs of another person above your own. It’s forgiving often and seeing past someone’s flaws to the value beyond.

Love is overcoming obstacles, facing challenges, fighting to be together, holding on and never letting go. It is a short word, easy to spell, difficult to define, and impossible to live without.

Love is hard work, but most of all, Love is realizing that every hour, every minute, and every second was worth it because you did it together.

Love is a beautiful, timeless work of A.R.T., and you are the artist! Every sunrise offers up a brand new, blank canvas just waiting for you to create a stunning masterpiece.

Every artist needs the right tools for the job, and love is no exception! The A.R.T. of love requires:

A-ction– Spend intentional time together, have fun, laugh often. Initiate intimacy. Treat your spouse in a kind loving way, even on the days when you don’t feel like they deserve it. Forgive freely. Hold each other often.

R-espect– Tell your spouse that you appreciate her. Be his biggest encourager; there are more than enough critics in the world already. Never demean or belittle your spouse in public or on social media. Walk away from anyone who speaks negatively about your spouse. Be proud of your spouse’s passions, talents, and career and tell him/her every chance you get.

T-alking– Great communication is the key to a great marriage. However, it doesn’t come naturally and takes practice and patience. Talk often; talk candidly. Listen without judgement. Take advantage of technology when you are apart. Deal with issues as they arise. Share your hopes, dreams, fears, failures, and successes.

You are a pilot wife–strong, beautiful, capable. You are also a talented artist and your canvas is waiting, so grab your tools and create a beautiful work of A.R.T.!

I love you, aviation family!


~Angelia (A fellow pilot wife)



14 thoughts on “The A.R.T. of Love”

    1. They have been closed and all new comments across the board are by moderation only. I know there is a lot to clean up after the storm, but it’s okay. I’m working on it. Thank you.

  1. Re your next posting: I agree there are 2 sides to every story. My questions are: Were 3 other people asked to leave, or denied entry? Or were there some empty seats already available? Why did United let the doctor (or anyone) board the plane instead of figuring the seating out before boarding?

    I read a few of your postings and like them and am now following you. My husband was a private pilot and we had friends that flew for commercial airlines. It is an interesting life and a bit different than normal. Fun. Sometimes exhausting. Not boring.

    1. I will gladly reply to civil and thoughtful discussion on the subject. As you can surely understand, I don’t find responding to name calling and death threats worth my time.

      Thank you for your thoughtful questions. Indeed, three other people asked to leave the aircraft. Two were airport employees (non-rev aviation and airport employees are the first to be bumped as we should be). The third was actually the doctor’s wife.

      The second question, whybthey let them board before figuring out seating–Someone made a mistake or was lazy. Or the crew was a lst second add due to all the weather delays and passenger shifting that day. I believe that Republic (it wasn’t actually even a United plne, but that’s a whole other aviation conversation) made terrible customer service and humanity mistakes. I never said it was a good decision, only that it was absolutely legal.

      You will hear many people telling you that it wasn’t legal to pull them once boarded. That is incorrect. I have aviation attorney backing on that. It was tacky to say the least, but legal. Again, it’s another long-winded legal reason and it actually has everything to do with 9/11 and the fact that an aircraft does not fall under regular law because it can simply remove a danger any time and lw enforcement is not always available (because it’s in the air at times!), so the crew has absolute say on who rides. They can kick anyone off the plane. True story.

      I’m glad you are now part of my aviation family. I hope you will stick around. The air will eventually clear. Tailwinds.

  2. Sorry you had to close the comments on your latest post. I agree with what you said. So sad how people have been so closed minded and just hear what they want to hear. Thank you for sharing the other viewpoint that people seem to want to ignore. Good luck with your blog! 🙂

  3. Allissa M Letts

    Dear Angelia, Thank you for your article regarding Flight 3411, it was so enlightening learning the federal laws behind the decisions. My husband flies regularly, mostly on United. We agree with so much of your commentary. Has he had delays and inconveniences? Of course. Do we appreciate the levels of security to keep everyone safe? Absolutely! Thank you again for sharing your insights. Please ignore the crazies out there – always the squeaky wheels – those who agree so rarely write to say so. Blessings, Allissa L.

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